Just Not Getting It.

September 17, 2008

I don’t expect anyone to really understand what’s going on inside my head right now. A few people have probably gotten close, but everyone else doesn’t get it.

I feel like I’ve just broken up with someone I’ve been in a serious relationship with for years. I feel like I don’t remember what my identity is supposed to be, what I’m supposed to be doing and how I’m supposed to be doing it. I have lost myself more than I thought I had previously…

Originally I was escaping to New York this weekend in hopes of getting away from Boston and everything it encompasses, but then I began to realize that it was just putting me in a place where I was going to think about where I wanted to live and what I want to do and money and I’m just all of a sudden so disorganized and unfocused.

I don’t even want to talk about it anymore. Everyone is wanting to know how I’m feeling and what I’m thinking but goddamnit I just don’t want to talk about it anymore.

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